Journal #18 My Biggest Fear

Beeing a male in today’s soceity, you are supposed to be a “tough guy”, show no emotion, never cry, and have no fears. America sees guys that show emotion as outcast and not real true men. Taking this in to consideration, I do have some real true fears that are in my every day life. One of my biggest fears that I have is death. I know that everyone does die in their life time but, it still scares me to think about it. It is just hard to think about dieing, and going to heaven or not depending on your beliefs. I believe in heaven and it is my life’s ultimate goal to be in heaven but, there is still that fear of what if I do not make it to heaven by living the life I should. That is a very frightening thing for me to think about. I am not scared of the usual things that some people are scared of such as spiders or snakes or things like that. Also many people are scared of being buried alive or dieing some specific way but, I am just scared of death and what comes after that. My belief is that you have to live the puriest life possible and be forgiven for all your sins or you will not get into heaven and be sentenced to a life in hell for eterninty. I have tried to live the purest life I can possibly live my life so far but, there is always that fear of the unknown because, I will not know until my time of judgement in my afterlife. What I think is right might be a sin in God’s eyes so I have to follow the Bible as closely as possible to try and live a life that is truly good enough to get into the gates of heaven. That is my biggest fear in this life and all I can do to get over it is to live the best life I possibly can.